just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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