As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
