Buhtt sex?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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