so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Fuck appropriateness.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
