I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize