We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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