so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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