YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
