So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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