We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Of course I have a pirate flag
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize