i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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