Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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