You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
