it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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