I wanna passion pit in your ass
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
