I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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