areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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