I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
My bed smells like the plague
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