I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Randomize
