I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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