Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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