you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
