didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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