we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
