***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
