I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize