I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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