Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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