Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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