I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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