I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
