i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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