gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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