you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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