kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
