I molested 6 butterflies tonight
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
