I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
