the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
