Pregnant stripper...not hot.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
