i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
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