Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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