i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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