Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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