how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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