we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
