Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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