just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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