so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize
