i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
