The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
