Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
