The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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